But How Does it Make You FEEL?

Saturday musings...

A very wise person once said to me (I am paraphrasing of course) -" they make not remember what was said or what was sung,  but if it's real and authentic, they will always remember how you made them FEEL."

I've been thinking a great deal about that this week.

Those of us in this business, or striving to be part of this business work very hard on developing business sense;  recognizing the pitfalls;  discovering and developing the product;  getting to the right class, the right coach, the right teacher;  developing a brand, or a catch phrase and and and;  making sure our audition book matches our type,  that our arias show our fach, and on and on...

But how does MUSIC make you feel?  How does singing make you FEEL?

I don't often get too personal on this blog,  but I have been thinking about this for myself a great deal this week.   I often get so busy with business and teaching,  that I forget to sing.  (some of you close to me who know me well will be laughing and saying, well DUH Susan!)

I haven't sung much since my Dad passed on.  That will be 2 years in March.  I mean REALLY sing.  Sing just BECAUSE I CAN and because I LOVE TO SING.

So as I question myself and get a little personal with this journey - I wanted to share it with you:

Have you asked yourself that seemingly simple question:  How does singing make you feel?

We can wrap so much neurosis up in our voices;  We can cause such great obstacles to be erected in the way of discovery;  we can simply create a fantasy life of what we can or cannot do with our craft, or lack thereof.  We can concentrate so much on what we think we MUST do to have a career that sometimes, we forget how much we LOVE to just sing.

Does "just" singing allow you to quit being critical for a moment?  To quit trying to "fix"?  To quit listening with a business ear and just make some noise cause it feels good?

Do you ever just sing something because you WANT to? Not because you HAVE to?

Do you ever sing something that isn't your fach? your type? your gender?

Are you an opera singer who would love to sing a country song? Just because?

Are you a theatre singer who loves Florentine art song?

And even if it never goes there - do you give yourself permission to sing something just so it feels GOOD; RIGHT; TRUE for YOU instead of right for the audition;  right for the class;  right for the stage; right for the teacher/coach or casting director?

We were drawn to music for a reason.  It moved us in some way.  It made us FEEL a certain way.  What was that?

I don't know about you - but I NEED that from time to time to remind me WHY I sing.  Not why I SHOULD sing,  but why in the dead of night I used to sit at the piano and JUST SING.

Why, when my daughter was a little girl,  we would put a CD in the player and dance and sing because it felt good, alive and real.

It is time for me to rediscover the "sing cause I wanna", not cause I have to.  I do remember how it makes me feel.  I don't want to be so busy that I can't recreate that love affair that is pure and uncomplicated and child-like perhaps.

I know my Dad would want that too.  He'd simply smile and say "what took you so long?"